Therapy is something we do together

You may be thinking about therapy because something particular has happened, or because you're struggling with anxiety, depression, loss, relationships or a period of change. Or it may be harder to put your finger on. Perhaps you feel stuck, overwhelmed or disconnected from yourself, or find yourself repeating patterns that you understand intellectually but still can't seem to change.

You might be very hard on yourself, find it difficult to express what you need, or spend a lot of time worrying about what other people think or feel. Or you may simply have a sense that something isn't quite right, without knowing exactly what it is.

You don't need to have worked any of this out before coming to therapy. Part of our work can be understanding together what is happening and what it means for you.

How I work

There isn't one way of doing therapy that works for everyone. We all bring different experiences, relationships and ways of coping with life's difficulties, so I believe it's important that our work reflects what matters to you.

My role isn't to tell you what to do or decide what's best for you, but to listen, ask questions and help us explore things that may be difficult to make sense of on your own. The relationship we build is an important part of this. Feeling able to talk openly, including when something doesn't feel right between us, can help us understand what's happening.

Sometimes we'll focus on what's going on in your life now. At other times, we might look at earlier experiences and how they continue to affect you. For example, you might notice that you often put other people's needs before your own, find it difficult to express anger, or worry about disappointing people. These ways of responding may have made sense at an earlier point in your life, even if they're making things harder for you now.

Therapy can help us develop a greater understanding of ourselves: why we respond as we do, how our experiences have shaped us, and what our feelings might be telling us. Change doesn't always mean doing things differently straight away. It might begin with noticing feelings we've learned to ignore, becoming less critical of ourselves, recognising our own needs or finding more compassionate ways of looking after ourselves. Over time, this understanding may open up possibilities for responding differently, both to ourselves and in our relationships with others.

Paying attention to more than words

Not everything we experience is easy to put into words. Sometimes we know that we're anxious, angry, sad or uncomfortable without fully understanding why. At other times, we may notice something first in the body - tension, a heaviness, a knot in the stomach, an urge to withdraw - before we know what we're feeling.

The ways we relate to one another can also help us understand patterns or experiences that are difficult to see elsewhere. This isn't about analysing everything you say or searching for hidden meanings. It's about being curious together about what happens and noticing what might be important.

An integrative approach to psychotherapy

Being an integrative therapist means drawing on different ways of understanding people and their difficulties because I believe our emotional lives are complex, and no single way of understanding them can explain everything. These different perspectives inform how I understand and respond to what you bring, without assuming that any one of them holds all the answers.

I also believe it's important to recognise that our difficulties don't exist in isolation from the wider world. Our social and cultural backgrounds, and experiences of difference, can affect our lives in many ways. I try to remain open to how these circumstances may be relevant to you, without assuming that I already understand your experience. This includes being aware that I bring my own background, perspectives and assumptions into our relationship.

Drawing on different approaches allows me to respond flexibly to what emerges in our work. Sometimes that might involve exploring difficult feelings or experiences; at other times, finding practical ways to manage anxiety or feeling overwhelmed. We can discover together what is most helpful for you.

Most importantly, we work at your pace. You don't have to know where to begin, and there isn't a particular way you're supposed to 'do' therapy. We can discover together what is most helpful for you.